Nanny

She was to me, 'Nanny'.

Dad and his siblings called her 'Che'. Well, her name is Che Puteh Asmah and perhaps she was not used to the idea of being called by any other name. According to my parents, even her grandkids would have called her 'Che' but in the end (and to avoid us from being seen as bloody rude kids), the adults thought it was better if the grandkids called their grandmother something else.

So that was how 'Nanny' became what she was. Personally, I thought the term 'Nanny' was in reference to her being around and taking care of her grandchildren. Mom however, said it's a variation of 'Granny' and one that would not have made the grand old dame feeling old.

This space was originally meant for a picture of Dad as an infant with Nanny.
However, Dad has requested me to remove it due to its...err, inappropriateness.

Nanny with her mother and Dad's two elder brothers

To me, Nanny was certainly a force to be reckoned with. Even in her twilight years, she would be quick to engage people in conversations, make those sudden quips and verbally shoots the unsuspecting party that crosses her path. On the good days, she would be (if I remember correctly) that doting grandmother with a joke to share. On those not so good days, her temper will get the better of her and woe betide anyone that treads on her thinning patience. But from what I could remember of her, she was the one whose shoulder I rested my head on when we went travelling long distance by car. She was the one who bears the faint whiff of talcum powder whenever she goes. She was also the one who was ever so concerned when I was down with fever at age 10.

Dad on so many occasions, shared stories of his childhood with Nanny. To this day, I will always find it amusing that Nanny invented the word 'homosakula' when in actual fact, she was trying to explain the word 'homosexual' to her kids. There was also another story on how Nanny visited Dad and my uncle who were studying in UK at that time. It was her first overseas trip and while the sons were fretting with worry in the arrival lounge, Nanny took her own sweet time before finally making an appearance. Mom also once recounted that during the early days of Mom's marriage to Dad, Mom's relatives would be afraid to approach Nanny for fear of the comments that would eventually leave Nanny's mouth. There were many other (fun, zany and downright unbelievable) stories about Nanny but let me just say some memories are best kept within the family circle for us to cherish.

As I'm older now, I too realised that perhaps my siblings and I have inherited more of Nanny's traits than we realized. Thanks to her being born a Chinese, all of us now bear varying degrees of Chinese features. If one observes Dad's family members, one could be forgiven for thinking that it's the typical Chinese family without any inkling of our Malay ancestry as well. Most of us are, like Nanny, rather reserved but quick to trade barbs when the mood strikes. If at all, we're the living testaments that while Nanny may no longer be with us, she's still in us.

Nanny with her husband and kids. According to Dad, this would have been the only complete family picture ever taken. They were holidaying in Penang back then.

Although Nanny passed away today 15 years ago, I felt as if it was only yesterday. I was only 12 years old when she died, too young to realise what it meant to have a grandmother (my maternal grandmother passed away even before I was born). Now, I could only look at old photos of her and reminisce about the snippets of memories shared with my Nanny whenever I see other people with their grandmothers. The 12 years I shared with her were far too short.

Lest anyone thinks Nanny had an easy life, let me confirm otherwise. She had her fair share of pain and sufferings but I think she overcame those with sheer tenacity that I could only expect from Nanny. Her end unfortunately came too soon with the onslaught of Alzheimer and Parkinson, reducing her to a shadow of what she had been earlier in life. But to the end, I'm proud that I've had the privilege of being her granddaughter. I could only hope that she's equally proud of my siblings and I.

Nanny was Nanny, no one could replace her. Not then, not 15 years later, not ever.